890: Maintaining you freshly clean car

Thanks to Thomas C:

“When you go through the automatic car wash, and to get out the ONLY exit, om a bright sunny day none-the-less, you need to splash though a mud puddle.”

Continuing points to consider…

Go to fullsize imageBirdie Birdie: The when you get 1/2 a mile down the road a seagull leaves a present on your windshield. It’s small so you decide to use your windshield wiper fluid but instead of cleanly washing it off it smears all across the windshield making it worse than before and partially obstructing your view.  Now you have to move your head around it.

Go to fullsize imageStep Off: everyone has that friend steps into your newly vacuumed car with rocks/pebbles/sand and the mud of a 1000 funks finely plopped into the floor mats in your car. Then as they comfortably sit down you look at them in shock.  They notice the offside look and return to look at you like nothing’s wrong when you give them the death glare.

A sprinkle of sunshine: you park your car in the lot and after an hour of so of shopping you come back to see your car lightly dusted with a fresh coat of pollen, welcome the spring time!

Splish Splash: as if your car couldn’t sparkle any longer it begins to rain and hail now some 15 minutes later!

Go to fullsize imageChuck and Duck: As you are sitting at a red light waiting for the light to change cycles you notice the car next to you with its darkly tinted windows  you try to figure out who’s in there.  A few seconds later the window opens and a hand reaches out and dumps their slurpee or caramelized soft drink out the window and it splashes on the side of your car.  The window rolls back up and the car dashes off.  BEEEEEEP!! Oh the light was green and you take off in your sticky car.



903: People Who Can’t Make Up Their Mind

Thanks to Justin J:

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“An awfully annoying moment is when people can’t make up their mind at a convenient time.  Like you’re driving towards someone’s house cause they want you over to hang out and 3/4ths of the way there they tell you that they’re sorry that they can’t hang out.  So you turn back and half way home from the point you turned around then they change their mind and then they say come back.

So you decide to park to make sure that they are sure about what they have decided and they take 20 minutes to decide and end up saying I’m sorry again I can’t hang out after all.  I have work in the morning it’s getting late we can hang out some other time.”

What is that all about?!  When that other time is…who knows?  Why they changed their mind…who knows?  But what we do know is that this is awfully annoying and isn’t any bit cheap on gas!

909: When your phone drops in between the seat and door

As if we aren’t distracted enough between checking the texts at red lights, checking missed calls while on the road.  We really should just be focusing on driving.  We all know that but do we do it?  Sometimes we cringe because as one friend told me, “I can’t help but stay connected!”

Well as you reach to grab your phone as it rings and as you make sure you are staying safely in the lane you accidentally drop the phone in the space between the car and the door and can’t seem to grab it.  The phone neatly buzzes there looking at you laughing at you with it’s glowing little “1 Missed call” eyes.

As you reach the phone slides further between the crack and your hand isn’t thin enough to make the wedge to safely grab your phone.  Thankfully you’re at a red light now you can slide back your seat and reach but apparently you still can’t reach the phone.  So now you have to unbuckle your seatbelt crouch under your seat and grab the phone.


Green light and the car in front of you is half a block up the road!  Now how awful is that?!

937. Getting stopped at a red light when no one’s there

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It’s 2:00 a.m. you are making it back home from the [club/bar] party, and you decide to spice up your route to prevent from getting drowsy, to take a scenic route.  As you are driving through you are on smooth sailing road hitting all of the green lights.  You hear a song you like then turn up the volume and jam out a little tapping on the steering wheel.

As you approach the next intersection you start seeing in the distance it turn yellow.  You begin to slow down since it’s a good few feet away, oh no cars are on either side of the intersection it’ll turn green soon.  As the light then turns red you begin slowing down and creeping to the stop bar.  Still what seems to be a minute you have to now make complete stop idling in neutral will not help.

Go to fullsize imageThere is no one out on this road intersection of traffic and you look at your dashboard clock, 2 minutes has passed by.  You start to lower your music so you can hear the car idling as you are waiting and searching around hoping at least one car from the opposite direction to at least give this wait some purpose.  So you start pulling up forward a little hoping the ground sensors will recognize a car is at the bar.  You then see the opposite direction lights finally turn yellow.

Go to fullsize imageFinally, you think great I’ll get through this light!!  As the light slow turns to red and then you get your car out of park because literally 4 minutes has gone by you hover your foot over the gas pedal.  No, wait.  The turn signal has just lit up…


Now how awful is that?!

982. When you lose the upclose parking spot


So you’re off to the mall or local store and you’re making your rounds through to the parking lot.  Not really in the mood for a mecca like jihad walk to the entrance of the store you start to shark around for a parking spot closer to the entrance.

As you pull around you see a spot on the other side of the row.  As you round the corner another car has pulled into that spot way before you could even claim it.  Geesh! miffed at the thought you continue your search only to find another one and as you approach another car the opposing direction waits too, so instead of being courteous because obviously you got there first they pull in and happily walk away!

Was that necessary?! As you cuss them out as you drive by…now how awful is that?!

Further watching – “Top 5 Famous Car Park Fights & Scenarios”

* Cat Fight at Car Park

* Car Park Fight

* The Answer to Bad Car Parking Scenarios

* Mr. Bean Parks a Car

* Madea Car Parking Revenge