878: The Mini Spaz Attack When Your In Bed, Half Asleep And Imagine Your Falling

In honor of Hannah P

Ever lie in bed and gotten to the REM state of sleep and ready to just hit the deep sleep and then you are still half awake and have a dream where you are being chased and you jump?  Well not only do you jump, so does your body.  At times where you get up and hit the floor or the person laying next to you in bed (your significant other, loved one, whomever it may be).  Then you get up in a slight panic and then realize it was only a dream and you breathe to a point of calmness then lie back down slouching a bit over to the middle of the bed in hopes of not falling over the bed!

Awfully spazzed out!View Image

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881: When your cell phone dies with no warning

Go to fullsize imageTalk talk talk away!  Hopefully you aren’t in a roadside emergency or you weren’t getting directions to your friend’s wedding reception because when your phone cuts off on you just hope that you have a charger or at least 50 cents to get you to a nearby pay phone to make that call.  Oh wait…the number is stored on the phone and I don’t have the number memorized – awful!

883: Pouring a bowl of cereal only to realize you have no milk

Thanks to Brandon E:

Got the midnight snack munchies?!

You wake up in the middle of the night and think what would really satisfy your hunger pangs and just settle it over till you have to wake up?

Cereal!

You moozy on over to the kitchen pick out the cereal (my fav Frosted Flakes) and you our out a great big bowl of cereal.  As you’re halfway awake you close back the cereal box and put it back in the cupboard.  As you go over to the fridge you stop, turn, and get a spoon.  You turn back and reach for the milk you stare.  No milk!

Huh?  You close the door and think to yourself maybe the light was too bright as you were squinting to find the container – you reopen the fridge door, oh no the milk container was behind the OJ.  You lift up the container and it nearly flies off the shelf.  Huh…that’s funny.  As you open up the spout and give it a sniff – yup fresh – you turn the container to pour…

Go to fullsize imagea drop of milk comes out! No milk, really..no milk.  Apparently it was a novel idea to drink the milk and leave the milk container in there empty – thanks roomie!  Now how awful is that when they wake up to find the empty container sitting at their nightstand in the morning!

884: Easter Egg Hunts

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You would think oh how fun, but I find that there are 5 reasons why I think that although this exciting adventure may b a fun romp in the field, it can be quite an upsetting experience!

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5. Hard to reach eggs: if they are in the muddy banks or in a spot where you have to help find a friend to give you a “boost” to reach in the tree.

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4. Money eggs: Hidden eggs that have only a penny in it  or just a piece of paper that says “You’re egg-static!”, what no dollar?!

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3. Overacheiver hunters: People who aren’t part of the Easter egg hunt who find it after you’ve hid it in a park and claim that “the didn’t know” as they eat the candy and litter the empty shell and then walk away with a bag full of eggs.

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2. Bad weather during an egg hunt.

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1. Adult eggs hunts: They are for kid’s you never see them planned for adults, sure they can “play” along, but where are they at?!

Just step on my egg-citement like a rotten egg why don’t you, guess I’ll have to go back to my Hatchlings app and hunt for virtual eggs – maybe that’s better and less awful of an option!

885: Poorly Decorated Easter Baskets

Go to fullsize imageNothing is more fun than getting an Easter Basket filled with sweet surprises and joyness, but when you come to opening up the basket and you look inside and think what is this?!  Here are top ten things not to put in your child’s Easter basket:

Go to fullsize image10. Stickers: sometimes they never make it on the egg!

Go to fullsize image 9. Pre Eaten Candy: just takes half the fun away.Go to fullsize image 8. Edible Easter Grass: we teach kids not to eat grass!

Go to fullsize image 7. Actual Bird Eggs: let’s not confuse these w/candy

Go to fullsize image 6. Odd Easter bunny toy: yeah back in the toy box

Go to fullsize image 5. Bad Easter Sweater: really, who wears that?!

Go to fullsize image 4. Laundry Baskets: will never be an Easter basket!

Go to fullsize image 3. Woven bunny handbags: just a plain no no…Go to fullsize image2. Spiced Jelly Beans: are just plain gross!

Go  to fullsize image 1. Sexually suggestive candy: enough said.

So just keep these in mind f you are putting together a basket of your own for this Easter holiday!  Just awful ideas!

Further Reading:

* Things to put in your Easter Basket

* Easter basket history

* Cheap Easter basket ideas

889: Craving Chick-Fil-A on a Sunday

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…and they’re closed!

Awful!

890: Maintaining you freshly clean car

Thanks to Thomas C:

“When you go through the automatic car wash, and to get out the ONLY exit, om a bright sunny day none-the-less, you need to splash though a mud puddle.”

Continuing points to consider…

Go to fullsize imageBirdie Birdie: The when you get 1/2 a mile down the road a seagull leaves a present on your windshield. It’s small so you decide to use your windshield wiper fluid but instead of cleanly washing it off it smears all across the windshield making it worse than before and partially obstructing your view.  Now you have to move your head around it.

Go to fullsize imageStep Off: everyone has that friend steps into your newly vacuumed car with rocks/pebbles/sand and the mud of a 1000 funks finely plopped into the floor mats in your car. Then as they comfortably sit down you look at them in shock.  They notice the offside look and return to look at you like nothing’s wrong when you give them the death glare.

A sprinkle of sunshine: you park your car in the lot and after an hour of so of shopping you come back to see your car lightly dusted with a fresh coat of pollen, welcome the spring time!

Splish Splash: as if your car couldn’t sparkle any longer it begins to rain and hail now some 15 minutes later!

Go to fullsize imageChuck and Duck: As you are sitting at a red light waiting for the light to change cycles you notice the car next to you with its darkly tinted windows  you try to figure out who’s in there.  A few seconds later the window opens and a hand reaches out and dumps their slurpee or caramelized soft drink out the window and it splashes on the side of your car.  The window rolls back up and the car dashes off.  BEEEEEEP!! Oh the light was green and you take off in your sticky car.

Awful!

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